Recent searches
Search options
Administered by:
For future reference, since it seems like it might be necessary sooner rather than later, if things come out of the Vatican smokestack:
- Black smoke means there's no new pope.
- White smoke means there's a new pope.
- Red smoke means shit is about to get real at the Vatican.
- Purple smoke means Jimi Hendrix is the new pope.
- Green smoke means it's currently 4:20 at the Vatican.
- Blue smoke means the Vatican is no longer working, please call tech support.
- A shit-ton of smoke means the Vatican is currently on fire.
- Intermittent smoke means, "Help, cardinal currently trapped in Vatican fireplace, send Swiss guard with tub of lard."
- Orange smoke means a rascally cardinal is playing a practical joke.
- Multicolored smoke means the Vatican has invested in some illegal Chinese fireworks.
- Snakes which whisper that the day of judgment is at hand mean it may be time to duck and cover.
- Bats mean the Joker is pope.
- The body of the old pope means buckle up, shit's about to get weird.
If that seagull comes back, I have no idea what that means. Maybe the seagull should be pope.
@intransitivelie@beige.party No smoke means the vatican might have discovered more modern and envionmentally friendly ways of communicating.
@ember
I was shocked to learn that the smoke is only about 100 years old as a custom. I thought it dated back centuries. Apparently before that they just used the bells of St. Peter's, which they still do as well.
Cardinals aren't allowed to announce the news in any other way than smoke and bells. Text mess are verboten 