# orderedItems[].object.content
@QueenOfCoffee @the_etrain Sadly sounds like something that would have happened at MY aunt's house. She actually killed two ferrets in her clothes dryer (two different occasions, one stupid aunt).

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
@QueenOfCoffee @the_etrain Sadly sounds like something that would have happened at MY aunt's house. She actually killed two ferrets in her clothes dryer (two different occasions, one stupid aunt).

# orderedItems[].object.content
@alan Oddly enough, I made Daddy take a state test while Mommy dealt with the baby. As soon as he was done and came back to class, baby chilled out. Ooops? @rockmastermike

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
@alan Oddly enough, I made Daddy take a state test while Mommy dealt with the baby. As soon as he was done and came back to class, baby chilled out. Ooops? @rockmastermike

# orderedItems[].object.content
Me: I had a fussy two-week old baby in my classroom today.
@rockmastermike: So you need a double?

My husband, he gets me!

#cocktails

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
Me: I had a fussy two-week old baby in my classroom today.
@rockmastermike: So you need a double?

My husband, he gets me!

#cocktails

# orderedItems[].object.content
@Jorsh @SnowshadowII Thank you both for raising the Asshat Alarm.

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
@Jorsh @SnowshadowII Thank you both for raising the Asshat Alarm.

# orderedItems[].object.content
Last week, I saw The Abominable Dr. Phibes for the first time and thought it was the weirdest Vincent Price film-making could be. Well, now we're watching an even crazier sequel...

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
Last week, I saw The Abominable Dr. Phibes for the first time and thought it was the weirdest Vincent Price film-making could be. Well, now we're watching an even crazier sequel...

# orderedItems[].object.content
Two members of my #curling club are getting married in a couple of weeks. We celebrated at the club with cake and fireball.

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
Two members of my #curling club are getting married in a couple of weeks. We celebrated at the club with cake and fireball.

# orderedItems[].object.content
I keep seeing things about "Beaver Moon". Does that mean we gals need to drop trou and bend over?

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
I keep seeing things about "Beaver Moon". Does that mean we gals need to drop trou and bend over?

# orderedItems[].object.content
@rockmastermike That one is pretty special.

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
@rockmastermike That one is pretty special.

# orderedItems[].object.content
@talia_christine You don't want to know about the bloodbourne pathogen scenarios. One involves listening to a middle school boy barfing in the middle of the cafeteria.

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
@talia_christine You don't want to know about the bloodbourne pathogen scenarios. One involves listening to a middle school boy barfing in the middle of the cafeteria.

# orderedItems[].object.content
Online training modules can be hilarious! I mean, the giggle factor about DAT ASS!

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
Online training modules can be hilarious! I mean, the giggle factor about DAT ASS!

# orderedItems[].object.attachment[].name
A slide from a training module on sexual harrassment, showing a man bent over a water cooter and two women giggling while checking out his butt.

# orderedItems[].object.content
@AVL_5 Such a floof!!!!

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
@AVL_5 Such a floof!!!!

# orderedItems[].object.content
@Danetteb @RickiTarr Hell, I remember ashtrays on airplanes.

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
@Danetteb @RickiTarr Hell, I remember ashtrays on airplanes.

# orderedItems[].object.content
@oldrawgabbit I just showed this to my high school ELA students. Now I need to weep. @JL_Lycette

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
@oldrawgabbit I just showed this to my high school ELA students. Now I need to weep. @JL_Lycette

# orderedItems[].object.content
My optimistic side: I can get through the next four years under this administration. The dude can't run again, so there IS an end-point

My realistic side : Odds are that Thomas and Alito will retire in the next four years. Guess who will have a FOREVER legacy in the Supreme Court?

My anxiety:

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
My optimistic side: I can get through the next four years under this administration. The dude can't run again, so there IS an end-point

My realistic side : Odds are that Thomas and Alito will retire in the next four years. Guess who will have a FOREVER legacy in the Supreme Court?

My anxiety:

# orderedItems[].object.attachment[].name
A comic representation of the original poster in fetal position.

# orderedItems[].object.content
So, do @rockmastermike and I have any #curling friends in the Montreal area? We MIGHT be through there late this month.

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
So, do @rockmastermike and I have any #curling friends in the Montreal area? We MIGHT be through there late this month.

# orderedItems[].object.content
@ozof Sad thing is that I'm a damn good sweeper!

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
@ozof Sad thing is that I'm a damn good sweeper!

# orderedItems[].object.content
I'm dealing with a bursitis flareup in my right knee (courtesy of an old theatre injury back in 1992), so I had to find a #curling sub for tomorrow. Goal is to be back on the ice by Tuesday.

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
I'm dealing with a bursitis flareup in my right knee (courtesy of an old theatre injury back in 1992), so I had to find a #curling sub for tomorrow. Goal is to be back on the ice by Tuesday.

# orderedItems[].object.content
@Lana The true horror was realizing this was NOT a parody.

Fuck, fuck, fuck, FUUUUUUCK!

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.en
@Lana The true horror was realizing this was NOT a parody.

Fuck, fuck, fuck, FUUUUUUCK!

# orderedItems[].object.content
@WrenArcher Not this time. @NataliaArmyOf1

# orderedItems[].object.contentMap.pt
@WrenArcher Not this time. @NataliaArmyOf1